The Only Parenting Shortcut I’m Aware Of: The Dopamine Detox
Many of us probably wish that parenting had more shortcuts - magical tricks that would result in perfectly well-behaved, delightful children with little effort and lots of payoff.
Unfortunately, like most things in life, enjoyable parenting is a “long game”, with no quick fixes.
But there is one exception: The Dopamine Detox.
The Dopamine Detox is the only quick parenting fix that truly does result in dramatic results in a relatively short period of time.
What does it entail? Tapering down your child’s access to screens over a period of days, and then completely removing screens for four weeks.
Why does it work? The answer may surprise you:
Screens can be as impactful to the developing brain as drugs like morphine or heroin (Kardaras, 2016).
Screens cause unnaturally huge spikes in dopamine, a neurotransmitter associated with rewards and pleasure (Koepp et al., 1998).
While most sources of dopamine take time to obtain and don’t last long, screens are an easy source of dopamine that can be repeated endlessly for hours.
What’s the impact on children’s behavior after they’ve become accustomed to quick and constant dopamine from screens?
You’ve all seen it before. Picture the cranky child who’s been playing video games for hours, and has just been asked to turn off his game and come to the dinner table.
Irritability and restlessness.
Obsession with screens.
Withdrawal from other activities.
Disrupted sleep.
Social withdrawal.
Mood swings.
Decreased executive function.
Lagging emotional regulation skills.
Many parents are surprised to hear that these effects can be observed even in children with relatively minimal exposure to screens, even within the limits prescribed by the American Academy of Pediatrics.
The keys to success with the Dopamine Detox are:
Taper down your child’s screen exposure by about an hour per day until you have reached zero. Although some advocates recommend going “cold turkey” on screens, it is generally easier on children and families to taper down screen exposure.
Replace screen time with engaging activities that boost dopamine naturally. Rather than leaving your child to fend with boredom as they detox from screens, be intentional about replacing their screens with activities that will keep them busy: exercise/movement, cooking, spending time outside, playing with friends, and making art are good examples.
What can you expect after your child has had four weeks to reset their brain? Improved attention span, enhanced creativity, better sleep, reduced irritability, improved emotional regulation, and better social skills, to name a few.
If it sounds too good to be true, I encourage you to give it a chance. There’s nothing to lose and much to gain from focusing on “real life” for a few weeks!
